Jen (thebuttonontop) wrote,
Jen
thebuttonontop

Standard Issue

Vent. just... needed to vent.

usual disclaimers... they belong to each other and some acronyms that dont understand what they have.   ianto, however, i relate to far too well for my own good.
right now i'm not sure where he ends and i begin in this fic.  




Ianto eyed the space where Jack had been. Where he'd last seen him... kissed him... loved him. He ran his hands over the chair in jack's office, tentative fingers over the edge of the desk. Tears ran unabashedly down his face, as he walked through the hub. Reliving all of the memories, bittersweet as they were. He could remember every kiss... every caress, every moan and whimper that he'd ever shared with Jack Harkness.
Ianto was good. He knew everything.
Which is how he knew that Jack was off with his Doctor. He was off saving the world, and he had left Ianto behind. Discarded. Left him with all of the memories of them, off to make new ones with the doctor. Being a hero, because that’s what Jack Harkness did. He was a hero. But no one ever thinks of the one that the hero leaves behind. The one that cleans up after him and who quietly loves him.

His circuit of the hub complete, Ianto found himself standing in Jack's bunker. He stared at the bed. So empty... the room so void of the brightness that was Jack. He stared at the bed for a long time before finally curling up in it; he wrapped himself in a shirt that still smelled like his Captain, wrapping himself in the smell that was so uniquely Jack. Ianto curled up and silently cried himself to sleep. Because that’s also what he did. Because there was no one else to understand.

Ianto knew that jack would be back ... he'd bring his bravado and his stories and he would be accepted back immediately... because that’s what he did. He was the hero. And Ianto would wait for him in the background. In the shadows and he would silently support his captain. Because someone needed to. Because without that support beam, Jack was nothing. He didn't know this, of course. Didn’t realize without that quiet Welsh voice gently laughing with him or whispering to him in his sleep, he would fall apart. Because even hero’s need support.
But nobody ever thinks about that. Except Ianto. And so he cried himself to sleep as he waited.
Ianto knew that Jack would go again, he would find another adventure, another world to save or just another story to tell... and he knew that he would follow. Because that’s what he did. That’s what he would always do. Always for Jack.
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